EASTSIDE LOVE ADVICE with TIA CONCHA

Dear Tia Concha,

I met this Cool Vato on MySpace and he wants to take me out on a date. My problem is that he wants to take me out to dinner at a Taco Truck, so I told him “Oh, HELL NO!  and now he’s all feelings with me. I wish that he would take me like to this fancy place in East L.A. called “La Serenata De Garibaldi” or someplace like that. Tia Concha, what should I do? Signed,

Sorrow, Confusion, Anger & Grief, Montebello

Dear S.C.A.G.,

Sabes Que?, “La Serenata De Garibaldi” isn’t even REAL E.L.A., It’s an artificial, wannabe high class pinchi outpost for yuppies and westsiders who want to claim that they go have dinner in E.L.A. It’s the “Eastside without the “Eastsiders.”, so come down off those high huaraches and get real Esa!

 

Dear Tia Concha,

I’m the type of guy who is turned on by strong women in positions of power. Lately, I’ve been having romantic thoughts and fantasies about one woman in particular and it’s driving me crazy. That woman I dream about is, L.A. County Supervisor Gloria Molina. What advice can you give me? Signed,

Bob Osso, Silver Lake

Dear Baboso,

Calm down, Fool! That there is TOO MUCH JAMON PARA DOS HUEVOS!

 

Querida Tia Concha,

My fiancé and I met at an Immigrant Rights Rally last summer and now we’re both getting our Green Cards and having our wedding in a few months. We’re sending you an invitation and hope you will join us on our happiest day! Signed,

Fulana De Tal, Pico Union

Dear Fulana, Ay, That’s Sweet Mija! It’s so nice to see that even Illegal Immigrants are going “Green” these days.

 

Dear Tia Concha,

Last week, I came home unexpectedly and when I walked into the bedroom I found my wife Pancha in our bed with another woman. The other woman was on top of my wife so they didn’t notice I was there, after a few minutes I snuck back out of the house. I haven’t confronted her on it yet because I’m still in shock and I don’t know exactly what to do next. Tia Concha, I need your Consejos! Signed,

In A Bad Way, Lincoln Heights

Dear Way,

Now let me get this straight, You found Pancha with a Sancha giving her the Plancha? Sabes Que? My advice to you is “Let Sleeping Manfloras Lie”. If she’s still your Ruca, then respect her alternate lifestyles and wait for her to tell you about it whenever she’s ready. Besides, you’re a Cochino for peeping in on them, so don’t be a Chicken Shit Cabron, OK, Guey? (wacha how I get all my farm animals in?)

 

Dear Tia Concha,

A little bird told me that you’re an ex- gang banging CHOLA, is this true? Signed,

Chava, L.A.

 

Dear Chavala,

That wasn’t a Little Bird that told you, that was a PINCHI RATA!

 

Orale Pues! If any of you FOOLS out there want my advice on your Problemas De Amor, have comments, need schooling on any subject, have chismes, or if you just want to call me out, email me here or at latiaconcha@gmail.com. I might print your pinchi letter here next time. Also, you can add me as your homie at my new MySpace chingadera: www.myspace.com/tiaconcha

Tia Concha/ Y Que!

 

 

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About AlDesmadre

Al Guerrero, Artist/Humorist. Los Angeles, CA. Born in Ciudad Juarez, Chihuahua, Mexico and raised in East Los Angeles from the age of two, Al Guerrero grew up just steps from the famous Chicano strip, Whittier Boulevard. His youth experiences include witnessing and participating in the 1970 Chicano Power demonstrations, cruising cars on Whittier Boulevard, and graduating from Garfield High School. After dropping out of UCLA (with honors), he drew upon his lifelong passion for art and cartooning and pursued a career in graphic arts. During this period, he traveled overseas and found artistic inspiration from the masterworks he discovered within the European Art Museums. His career blossomed when he was eventually hired by the Walt Disney Company in 1995, where he worked as a creative artist for a number of years. Although the artistic work was rewarding, he eventually grew weary & disillusioned with the bureaucracy of the entertainment business, and left to work briefly in the educational field. His credits include producing a feature film with actor, Conrad Brooks of Ed Wood fame, founding and performing with the Punk Rock group “The Psychocats” at numerous L.A. & Hollywood venues during the 1990’s, and in 1999 he founded and created a hell-bent puppet cabaret show aptly named: “The Puppets from Hell”. As a long time active member of the Los Angeles Cacophony Society, Al “Quaeda”, as he was known, was involved in countless Cacophony Society pranks and events throughout the city. He also produced the “Incredibly Strange Cinema” cult film series as well as themed events such as the now infamous “Pornothon Movie Nights” and the satirical “Mexican Night: Noche De Tequila & Putas” shows at local nightclub venues. Throughout his art career, he has exhibited his canvas paintings at various local galleries, and has also written & illustrated numerous comic strips and Graphic Novel stories. Today, he lives in Silver Lake, California and works as a freelance artist and writer with numerous multi-media projects under his belt and in the works. His personal hobbies include collecting vintage toys and comic books, cinema history and Los Angeles City history. Contact: alguerrero@earthlink.net Al Guerrero P.O. Box 29697 Los Angeles, CA 90029-0697 www.alguerrero.com Myspace.com/thepuppetsfromhell

7 thoughts on “EASTSIDE LOVE ADVICE with TIA CONCHA

  1. Dear Tia Concha, how do you use WordPress?

    just kidding. this is great, I like this one a lot. keep it up.

  2. Hola Tia

    u need to get on facebook….come on Tia move to the next barrio…you can still be friends with myspace

  3. I’m joining another networking+friends site something called “Mascara Book”.
    Trucha!
    I’m doing “TWITTER” tambien! Just sign up with your digits and I’ll TWAT you!

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