My Pal, The Gas Company


(Gas man checking the gas lines. Of course he is.)

It’s a hopping Saturday Night with lots of festivity in the air: a couple of parties down the street with some loud ass Banda-Rancheras-sabra que mas playing, young mensos are tearing up the asphalt on their motorcycles probably headed to some desmadre or other, and my neighbor is going crazy dancing along to one of those new stupid “interactive” video games. Me? Break out the chelas and the checkbook cuz it’s bill paying time! Hey, it has to get done, que no?

So in the middle of this lonely pachanga of number crunching (and careful guesstimations of when these checks might get cashed) one of my bills reaches out to offer much needed company and friendship, which was quite touching. Yes, The Gas Company wants me to be their friend. On Facebook. It’s not every day a utility wants to hang out, even if only online.

My new utility friend has family, how nice. They only have 1,674 friends. I guess people don’t feel all warm and cuddly with a Utility company. Yet. But they hope to reach 2000 friends sometime soon.

Some time ago, when the paychecks were few and far between, The Gas Co. would send me threatening letters concerning imminent disconnections. But now, my new friend The Gas Company sends out semi-useful and often upbeat information that you don’t need at the moment, like what you should do if you are moving and want to transfer your gas service in just a few clicks, or how winter means heftier gas bills thus you should put on some extra blankets, and info about the awesome benefits that come with an online account. Mostly stuff that can probably be found on their website. What you been eating lately Gas Co? Where you been hanging out? Don’t you have some snippet of inspiration or a philosophical nugget of insight to share? This friendship seems all too utilitarian.

How odd to be alive in this era when your local provider of hydrocarbon gases wants to chum it up with you. But I did find this exchange kinda funny, a gas worker hoping for overtime. A glimpse at how your local utility really operates.

I accept your friendship.

They also have a twitter page, but who cares about that? Nobody uses twitter anymore.

Me and the Gas Company. Friends Forever.

P.S. The DWP does not want to be your friend. Cuz they are heartless bastards.

4 thoughts on “My Pal, The Gas Company

  1. Where does it say they want to be friends? It says follow them. Why are you hating on the worker for wanting OT? Oh and that picture isn’t the gas company. It would be pretty stupid and dangerous to have gas lines overhead. Next time you’re riding around on your fixie bike wearing your skinny jeans, v-neck shirt and scarf and you see a gas co. employee, ask him if he really earns his paycheck. You sound like a whiny lil hipster.

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