Dear Tia Concha,

I met this Cool Vato on MySpace and he wants to take me out on a date. My problem is that he wants to take me out to dinner at a Taco Truck, so I told him “Oh, HELL NO!”  and now he’s all feelings with me. I wish that he would take me like to this fancy place in East L.A. called “La Serenata De Garibaldi” or someplace like that. Tia Concha, what should I do? Signed,

Sorrow, Confusion, Anger & Grief, Montebello

Dear S.C.A.G.,

Sabes Que?, “La Serenata De Garibaldi” isn’t even REAL E.L.A., It’s an artificial, wannabe high class pinchi outpost for yuppies and westsiders who want to claim that they go have dinner in E.L.A. It’s the “Eastside without the “Eastsiders.”, so come down off those high huaraches and get real Esa!

 

Dear Tia Concha,

I’m the type of guy who is turned on by strong women in positions of power. Lately, I’ve been having romantic thoughts and fantasies about one woman in particular and it’s driving me crazy. That woman I dream about is, L.A. County Supervisor Gloria Molina. What advice can you give me? Signed,

Bob Osso, Silver Lake

Dear Baboso,

Calm down, Fool! That there is TOO MUCH JAMON PARA DOS HUEVOS!

 

Querida Tia Concha,

My fiancé and I met at an Immigrant Rights Rally last summer and now we’re both getting our Green Cards and having our wedding in a few months. We’re sending you an invitation and hope you will join us on our happiest day! Signed,

Fulana De Tal, Pico Union

Dear Fulana, Ay, That’s Sweet Mija! It’s so nice to see that even Illegal Immigrants are going “Green” these days.

 

Dear Tia Concha,

Last week, I came home unexpectedly and when I walked into the bedroom I found my wife Pancha in our bed with another woman. The other woman was on top of my wife so they didn’t notice I was there, after a few minutes I snuck back out of the house. I haven’t confronted her on it yet because I’m still in shock and I don’t know exactly what to do next. Tia Concha, I need your Consejos! Signed,

In A Bad Way, Lincoln Heights

Dear Way,

Now let me get this straight, You found Pancha with a Sancha giving her the Plancha? Sabes Que? My advice to you is “Let Sleeping Manfloras Lie”. If she’s still your Ruca, then respect her alternate lifestyles and wait for her to tell you about it whenever she’s ready. Besides, you’re a Cochino for peeping in on them, so don’t be a Chicken Shit Cabron, OK, Guey? (wacha how I get all my farm animals in?)

 

Dear Tia Concha,

A little bird told me that you’re an ex- gang banging CHOLA, is this true? Signed,

Chava, L.A.

 

Dear Chavala,

That wasn’t a Little Bird that told you, that was a PINCHI RATA!

 

Orale Pues! If any of you FOOLS out there want my advice on your Problemas De Amor, have comments, need schooling on any subject, have chismes, or if you just want to call me out, email me here or at latiaconcha@gmail.com. I might print your pinchi letter here next time. Also, you can add me as your homie at my new MySpace chingadera: www.myspace.com/tiaconcha

Tia Concha/ Y Que!

 

 

The County drawing the line in the sidewalk against taco trucks is on behalf of groups like Whittier Boulevard Merchants Association, East L.A. Chamber of Commerce and local merchants claiming the trucks lack of overhead is unfair competition. Yet, taco truck vendors have become an East L.A. cultural icon, and in some cases social centers, with cheap eats have had people rally behind them.

It’s become a quality of life vs quality of lunch issue. A cause from both sides of the sidewalk.

The saviors of carne asada at saveourtacotrucks, as noted here on L.A. Eastside and by the LA Times April 16, have been blogging the movement to prevent a movement of trucks that will be enforced by the Sheriffs under a new ordinance by the County.

The issue has reached the east-east-eastside in a NYTimes article that gives a solid overview that led to Thursday’s eat-ins at taco trucks in and around the County land known as East Los Angeles.

However, the headline reads “In Taco Truck Battle, Mild Angelenos Turn Hot” and opens with “Los Angeles, loath to rally cohesively around a local cause, has joined hands around tortillas.”

Well, not quite, Ms. New York Times embedded-in-Los Angeles scribe.

For Eastsiders to be considered “mild” when it comes to causes is a cheap angle, a 99 cent copy led, and just too a long of a reach. The Eastsider is not the mythical mellow Angeleno having brunch patio side with the Sunday Times of any city.

There is a distinct Eastside tradition of standing up for something ever since the freeways sliced through town, causing pockets of neighborhoods to float next to each other like Titanic survivors on life rafts.

Since then, no cause has been left behind.

Three things that come to mind right away: How the Gold Line Extension went through a labourious process of community approvals before deciding on the current route currently under construction. Then there was the local auditorium that was burned down by arson and concerts were held, including one by Los Lobos, to raise funds to rebuild it. And you may have heard of a massive anti-war march back in the 70s that took out one of your own, a journalist who was recently honored on a US Postage stamp.

Be assured, this side of town doesn’t loath for a cause. It thrives.